First off, a big congratulations to Mo’Nique for her tremendous performance in Precious and her subsequent Oscar win, truly well deserved. On the night of her Oscar win, we were all treated to Barbara Walter’s final Oscar special featuring Sandra Bullock and Mo’Nique. If you had the chance to watch it, then you heard Mo’Nique talk about her “open marriage” among other topics. Specifically when asked about having sex outside of her marriage she stated, “Could Sid have sex outside of his marriage with me? Yes. That’s not a deal-breaker,” She goes on to say, “that’s not something that would make us say, ‘Pack your things and let’s end the marriage.” She then said that she wouldn’t call it quits even if he had numerous flings. “What if it’s 20 times?…So what? We’ve been best friends for over 25 years, and we truly know who we are. Oftentimes, people get into marriages and they don’t know who they’re laying next to. I’m very comfortable and secure with my husband.”
Not long after this interview the media kicked in with full force causing Mo’Nique to clarify her statement on a post-Oscar win episode of Oprah. She stated,”When I said I had an open marriage, people automatically jumped to sex. They automatically went there. But I’ve been best friends with my husband since we were 14 years old. When we say open, we’re very honest. There are no secrets. Often times you have people that are married, but they’re strangers, and we refuse to be those people.” She concluded with, “I’ve had to sneak and I’ve had to lie, and I don’t want to do that anymore. But my husband is so awesome and so fine and so—oh, girl….No other man can compare.” (Hmmm….no judgment)
Nowadays, the definition of marriage is far from consistent across cultures, religions, etc. That said, if only one partner in the marriage wants to be intimate outside of the marriage, is that really an open marriage or is it simply one person getting their cake and eating it too? Likewise, if you know from the beginning that you’re not concerned with upholding that traditional covenant of marriage, by way of exclusive intimacy, then why not just continue dating until you’re ready for that level of exclusivity?
Let us know what you think Vyne readers.