8 Tips That Nurture Your Guy…or Plant


Green LoveBy Guest Contributor, Allison Brooke Gordon

There is a poem “Love is like a flower,” but when it comes to relationships, trying to keep a plant alive is an even better analogy. Here are a few basic tips for keeping your relationship healthy and green. No matter the plant species (ornamental, cacti, bonsai, fig) or male type (rugged, debonair, metro-sexual, athletic), for this lesson, consider them one in the same. *Green thumb not required*:

1. Watering – If you forget to water your plant for five days or more, don’t make up for it by dousing the soil. Rather, water more often, with less over saturation. The same holds true for affection with your man. A little attention more frequently leads to a more consistent growing relationship.

2. Pruning – Once you get to know your plant you will understand the cycle in which you need to prune. Cutting back and being prudent about certain stems can make a plant grow stronger and steadfast.  Letting every aspect grow uncontrollably will do more harm than good, and no one wants a weed. Be cautious though on which stems, habits or attributes you clip.

3. Atmosphere – Keep a light, cool and well ventilated atmosphere. Do not isolate your plant by restricting it to one place void of its own kind. Also, recognize places where you and your plant can have intimate moments. This will help it thrive. The kitchen (windowsill), the bedroom (night table), the bathroom (pedestal) are locations that can keep things new and exciting for your plant and you.

4. Communication– Talk to your plant even though it will most likely not answer and you may see a response over time (petals and leaves tilted or arms outstretched for an embrace). Try not to get frustrated if its not blooming quickly enough. Do not shout at it from a distance, and do resist the urge to exhale on it. It is a myth that hovering over and breathing on a plant is good for it.

5. Individuality – Remember that your plant is its own species. Do not care for a cactus like an orchid and do not try to make it one. Be respectful of their roots and allow room to grow. If you do not want your plant to grow, keep it in a restrictive pot or space so its roots can rot and die.

6. Time and Care – You may need to leave your plant alone due to a work trip or vacation.  Do be sure to give it plenty of water and enough food while you are away. If you will be gone for an extended time ask a trustworthy friend to keep an eye out while you are away.

7. Seek Outside Care Tips – Ask your friends that are surrounded by blooming plants, or in happy relationships, what they do to keep them flourishing. These experts may help you recognize that if need be, you should let a flaccid plant go.

8. General Health Tips – Plants and relationships will look pale and sickly at one time or another. Do not give up. Whether a perennial or seasonal, long distance or long term, there will be tough cycles. If you continue to nurture your plant or relationship it will come around. It is also fine to have more than one plant or relationship if you can keep them all alive and healthy, though better to have a healthy strong one than five wilted ones.

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